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Monday, January 30, 2012

Moving Stones

While others chose to hide the truth, the reality, the disappointments, and the harsh part of life, the Dust Fairy daughter continued to move one small pebble at a time with her Fairy Mother. She minded her manner, and opted for impeccable timing to push the stone a bit off the scale further. At time, she thought her effort was working, but at time watching her mother in full swing of destructive behavior, the Dust Fairy just wanted to disappear.

She cut off as much as she could with the negative energy by walking away, or by bluntly told her Fairy Mother "I don't want to hear about it"! It was a delicate matter, and must be handled sparingly. For so long, Fairy Mother used to say what she wanted to say, right or wrong, good or bad; her verbal expression blurted out exactly how she felt at the moment she felt it. She cared not about hurting other people's feeling or how vulgar it was to hear.

The need to satisfy her urge of talking was much greater than to pay attention to what coming out of her. The Dust Fairy knew that. She listened to some. She ignored some. And she cut off some. Mother Fairy had no choice but to be quiet when no one was listening.

She learned, very little, that her old ways turned people off. She caught herself some times, and loudly reminded herself that nobody wanted to listen to her in her most sarcastic voice.

That, however, was good enough for all the fairies to see a little light of hope. They knew quite well that expecting a complete change was impossible with Mother Fairy. She was too set in her own ways, but to minimize the pain for all relation was in order, and it had to be done now.

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Friday, January 27, 2012

Pink Azalea Flower

Lovely Pink Azalea

“When you don’t get what you want, you suffer. If you get it, you suffer too since you can’t hold on to it forever.” – Peaceful Warrior


"Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.” - Steve Jobs


“For every effect there is a root cause. Find and address the root cause rather than try to fix the effect, as there is no end to the latter.” --Unknown


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Wednesday, January 25, 2012

J is For Jumping

Growing up with one broken leg has left me with many wishes to yearn for! One of those wishes was to be able to jump or lift my body up in the air for just a moment. I wanted to feel that flying motion, that inhibiting feeling from grounding to the earth, and that lightness of air.

Watching other kids jumped ropes, skipped stairs, or swooshed down from a rock, I always wanted to know how it felt as the moment the body took off. It all looked so easy and so full of energy. Yet, for me it would mean a big blob on the ground, and scattered into pieces.


That small act of jumping, skipping, dancing, and twirling looked all natural to me, but my body wouldn't allow it in this life time. There were many things that I couldn't do without having two normal, healthy legs. I only wished, not envied, for a chance to know how it felt like to run, to prance around on the dance floor, and to skip a few steps.

Jumping to me was like freedom! That one split second when the body airborne was quite fascinating to watch! I knew now why so many people would risk their lives to seek this thrill and adrenalin rush.


The thought about parachute had entered my mind just once, but this wouldn't be feasible either since I had no control over my legs, which meant that when I landed, my legs wouldn't be able to support my body. Thus, I would be smacked down against the earth like a pancake.

I might never know how jumping would physically feel like, but in my mind I really know how wonderful it would be...

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Saturday, January 21, 2012

Changes In the Moon

The world through Mother Fairy's view is very small, and she often has no idea what it takes to live without her protected bubble. She dictated and gave command on what to do as if everything must conform to how she thought it should be. If anyone had the notion of explaining how it was done in reality, Mother Fairy would retreat to her favorite response of "how stupid", and held on to her idea to say the same thing at her next convenient.

With this kind of attitude, the fairies just allowed it to be, and walked away from confrontation. It was not productive to keep trying when the other party had made up her mind to see things how she wanted to see things, or how she saw things the way they should be.

Scramble to find a harmonious medium, one fairy daughter took on a daunting task of setting Mother Fairy straight. For some reason, the daughter knew in her mind and heart that if Mother Fairy continued on her destructive behaviors of shutting out all relationship, hurtful accusations, behaving badly, demanding for affection, requiring selfish attention, getting her ways, etc; that would lead to nothing but disaster!

Mother Fairy could only get older, and with such ill behaviors, she would meet the reality like a beating drum in her ears. If and when she needed the assistance of others beside her own children for medical care, she would have to be as her utmost sensible as possible. The daughter thought long and hard to find a way to break the thick mold to prepare her mother for what it might be.

She started by talking back in a subtle manner and consistently justified the wrong to right, the meanness to goodness. Slowly, very slowly,like changes in the moon, the daughter saw a tiny slight shift in her mother attitude.

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Friday, January 20, 2012

Deep Pink Rose

Half Pink and Half White Rose
Roses are on display in many stores and supermarket. I especially like these two tone colors of half white and half pink rose. It is unusual and pretty looking.

Different Perspective
Since many stores don't like people taking pictures inside, I have to just quickly snap a few photos. I like the curly petals at the very top of this rose.

Macro of Two Tones Rose

Valentine is coming, and of course it is the time for flowers and chocolate if you celebrate such a "lovely" occasion. Have a great weekend, everyone!

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Wednesday, January 18, 2012

I Is For Identity

My native name is on a hard side for people to pronounce once I immersed into the world of school and work. Everyone wanted to give me an American name so that they could identify me. It was an exciting proposal at first, and one that gave me a sense of belonging. Growing up there was nothing better than to feel normal and not different or stood out.

Hence, an American name was born, translated closely to the meaning of my Vietnamese name. It took time to get used hearing myself being called differently, but this name was only used by passerby and acquaintances that I might only met once or twice. Teachers and others tried their best to call me by my given name.


Once I had a job, another American name was born. I didn't like my translated name that much, so I came up with a different one to use with my co-workers. My identity became somewhat unimportant to me. I changed it whenever I was bored with the current one. New area, new name, and so forth! My official name seemed to only exist on paper.

I didn't care much on who called me what! If I recognized the name then I responded, but if not it was at no concerned to me. High school was over, and I was out in the real world. My identity was what I wanted at the moment. I was called Star, Moon, Flower, Wind, etc. and I was fine with them all.


Then marriage came, and I was confined to T's mom, H's mom, and J's mom. Otherwise, I was known as Mrs. R. I lost a sense of who I was, or who I really am. My given name was never heard often unless it was from my mom and siblings. I knew I was struggle trying to figure out who I was. Me, for myself, and not so many different strings attached to who I am.

Needless to say, when my identity was compromised, by my own fault, or by incidents, I was lost in the jungle of names. I couldn't identify my own identity, sadly. I was everybody else, but not me. I had too many shoes to fill in, too many roles to fulfill, and along the way, I adopted whatever identity that fitted me for the moment. I am now comfortable with the person that I am.

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Monday, January 16, 2012

The Consequence of a Protected Bubble

The pull and tug go on between Mother Fairy and her three children. She is used to be the number one, and got whatever, whenever she wanted since the fairies' father passed away. Everyone shielded her from the reality of life, and spared her heartache from all corners.

She knew nothing about paying bills, or anything about owning a home. Mother Fairy lives most of her life in a gigantic protected bubble. Having eleven children gave her that luxury, and if she was mad at one person, there were still ten others left to scoop her away as her first whine.

Unlike normal people, the more she was pampered, loved, taken care of; the worst her behavior became! It all got to the point of never enough to make her happy anymore. Never in a million year could the fairies thought love turned out to be so bad. The mother was now reversed back into a spoiled rotten "terrible two!"

No one could pinpoint to where things went wrong and so far off as it has become, but they all felt a slight suffocating whenever Mother Fairy was around. Her dependency and demand on everyone to make her happy took a deep backward step in the heart of the fairies.

Mother Fairy couldn't be happy! Nothing could make her happy! No one could make her happy! She tended to bring on negativity and chaos in order to be happy. The need for attention and to be in the center of attention ran everyone on an empty throttle. Strange but true that Mother Fairy could not grasp the concept of "happiness comes from within", and not throwing tantrum to seek temporary worship or a short flicker of attention!

Happiness has to be learned, and to be happy, one must learn to be happy on his or her own will...

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Friday, January 13, 2012

Pretty Pink Hydrangea

Pretty Pretty Baby Pink
This has to be the most pretty pink hydrangea I've seen so far! They are available in the supermarket around my world since nothing can grow in this cold weather at the moment.

Flowers and Buds
I like to sneak around in the flower section of the market for some photos! It is fun and I never know what I might have until I came home and upload them onto the computer. I think these come out wonderfully.

Close Up of the Buds Inside
I can't seem to grow these hydrangeas because my soil doesn't have the right mixture, and there isn't enough sun for them to thrive. So I enjoy looking at others who have huge bushes.

Have a great weekend, and thanks for stopping by.

Joining Pink Saturday, I Heart MacroToday Flowers!

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Thursday, January 12, 2012

H Is For Humor

Humor is something that I'm terribly lack off! I don't find too many things that are really funny, and can't seem to stomach stand-up comedies, especially when the jokes aimed at someone else's expense such as "my parents this or my wife that" type of things. Racist tease is another that just does not sit well either with me.

I admit, growing up here in American, I've absorbed lot of ways to ease up such as not worrying too much about what to wear, how I look, what others think of me, having fun playing cardboard games, and laughing at hilarious things. Since Asian culture tends to conform girls' behavior in public, it is quite liberating to just feel comfortable in my own skin.

Life seems to be a bit easier with having a sense of humor, and not always having to be serious all the time. Hence, for me, humor was a trained choice. I start out by watching family comedy shows such as Home Improvement, Everybody Loves Raymond, and a few others. Learning to let go and laugh are both soothing to the soul.

Stand-up comedies are still a struggle for me! I haven't found one that I really can pay attention to or laugh with the jokes yet. I once listened to Dan Cook through an iPod from the demand of the children, and thought he was funny, but I would not flip the remote control to look for stand-up comedy to see.


Yes, I have come a long way to ease up, and now I even notice that I try to make jokes too. Not many people find it funny or rolling around on floor laughing though. It just feels good to take life on the lighter side, and have a sense of humor too.

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Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Support Walgreens Affordable Prescription Club

This post brought to you by Walgreens. All opinions are 100% mine.

If I tell you that you could use $10 dollars to support your family, plus your pet for the entire year, what would you say? It is true! This is the Prescription Savings Club at Walgreens , which covers prescription drugs for your spouse, children under 22, and your pets, and gives you discount on more than 8000 brand-name/generic brand, flu shots, including diabetes supplies.

Since Walgreens and Express Scripts were no longer partners, forcing many people to find new pharmacies, interrupting in services, inconvenience hours and distance; Walgreens just wanted to do the right thing for their customers by offering this annual prescription membership. This special offer is good throughout the month of January, and single people only have to pay $5 dollars a year.

Monday, January 9, 2012

A Predicament Web

Once the fairy son came home, the sleeping over routine stopped, and everyone breathed a sigh of relief. The fairy grandchildren got their life back to somewhat normal beats. The daily chores of visiting and spending the night got taken off the schedule for them.

As the new saga began, the three fairy children needed to re-organize their life, their routine, and their priority to accommodate Fairy Mother. Being in an older generation, she spared her son of most household chores, and rarely asked him for any help.

The fairy son has his own "deacony" duties, and takes some classes at school.

One of the fairy daughters has a job and the other one works at home. Now, having a job outside the home as you all know, gets more respect than a home bound person in the eyes of society.

Mother Fairy was no different! The words "work at home" meant very much as "doing nothing all day!" So she called the work-at-home daughter (let's called her Dust Fairy) when she got bored any time, any day to "come over and play" or when she felt "sad and lonely". She refused to understand or comprehend the concept of "working at home", meaning you still work, but just at home.

Dust Fairy came to take her to the grocery, to window shopping, or to the dentist. The pressure and frustration built up as the daughter saw no way out of this predicament. Helping her mother was not a problem, but to be treated as un-importance was, and making herself disposable on demand was hard to comply. She is caught in a tangle web!

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Friday, January 6, 2012

Pretty Deep Pink Flowers

Deep Pink Flowers
Not sure what these flowers are called, but they were very attractive looking in this deep pink color, and in the light pink color that I have shown here last year too. Some think that they are snapdragon, and some think that they are a type of orchid.

Closer Look
I like the well in the heart of these flowers. They were very unique and interesting looking. My quest for this year is to look for the name of these flowers, just to satisfy my curiosity.

Snapdragons Or Orchids?
Looking through these photos, I could see part of the leaves, and it resembled the snapdragon's leaves! Could they be another variety of snapdragons, or could they be another type of orchids?

Wish you all a wonderful first weekend of the New Year!

Joining Pink Saturday, I Heart Macro, and Today Flowers!

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Wednesday, January 4, 2012

G Is For Gender

During my teenager years, my wish was to be a boy, a man, a male, not female! My pen name while writing for magazines was of a male. One of the editors wrote to me asking if I were a young man because he was taken by my writing, and I replied "I wish to be!" What he wrote back have stayed with me until this day: "Be a girl, natural, and as pretty as a girl!"

I thought about that beautiful sentence, and slowly it took root in me! "Be a girl, natural, and as pretty as a girl!" There was comforting and soothing in the affirmation of a male's perspective. I could not be a boy even if I wanted so much to be. So I would just be me, a girl, and happy with that.


In my world back then, boys had so much freedom, respected, and had no household chores. Parents, in general not just mine, preferred boys over girls since they could carried on the family name; therefore, generations would continue. I disliked the idea of being a girl, restricted, and under-valued.

My parents were ready and willing to trade their five girls in place of two boys, who were caught back in Vietnam after the war ended. I was not sure if they would actually go through it if they had a real chance, but to hear of how unimportant we girls were, hurt deeply in our soul and heart!


The men in my family had great power, though none of them abused that privilege to the extent of unbearable in general, but they each had a favorite sister or two. I was not found on those lists but rather on a black list instead!

Now that I am much older, I appreciate women, their strength, creativity, endurance, and intelligent. I accept that I am a woman; the best woman that I can be! The wish to be a male diminished after I read that one sentence in the mail long, long ago: "Be a girl, natural, and as pretty as a girl!"

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Monday, January 2, 2012

Sleeping Over

While Mother Fairy lived at the fairy son's home, her grand-fairies and daughter took turn to come over and spent the night as Mother Fairy was afraid to be alone. There were so many reasons and excuses, all legitimate, for Mother Fairy to use and for the fairies to comply. It was only right, and it was what needed to be done as A New Chapter has begun.

Culture and tradition played a heavy role in the fairies' lives! In fact, parents usually owned their offsprings' lives, and in the hands of skillful/wicked mind, the table often flipped to their advantage, leaving the children in reckless turmoil.

Needless to say, for six weeks each fairies either came to sleep over, or took Mother Fairy home for the weekend. Stress started building as high as a mountain as the fairies growing tired and weary. You see, all the fairies were now adults and have a different way of living, routine, important things to do, etc. It was not easy to pack up and sleeping on the couch night after night.

They were all waiting and wishing for a break! They all wanted to get back to their normal life! It boggled their mind that just a few weeks ago Mother Fairy lived by herself just fine, but here, she had a total different attitude. Giving her age, the fairies put in their best effort to accommodate her wants and wishes.

Two weeks before the fairy son came back, the grand children decided to cut down the sleeping over pattern,  and allowed her to stay by herself one day a week. With school and work schedule, they all hoped that Mother would soon realize that her life and their lives were in conflict. Her dependency and demanding on attention wore everyone down like a sinker in the water.

As the saga continues, the two fairy daughters, and son were left dealing with Mother Fairy ever changing moods...

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Natural Drink To Help With Inflammation

If you live with any type of chronic pain or arthritis pain, you know going through a day is not easy, and very frustrating to endure. During the winter and especially when there is a drastic change in weather, I suffer from inflammation more often.

I always opt for natural treatment or take supplement such as Turmeric when my friend recommended to me. However, the problem lies in my dislike for pills and forgetfulness with daily chaos. I would love to have in the form of food or drink, such as Nopalea (No-pah lay'uh) wellness drink.

I write what I feel, how I feel and whatever I like at the moment

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