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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I Is For Idling

A familiar situation has arisen and stirred up a hurtful feeling inside me, which brought anger, disgust, and pain back in my heart.  Keeping with the Raw cord of my blog, I'm just going to spill it out. Maybe by writing it, bring me some solace.

It is not easy for me to deal with family members.  I tend to just shut up, harbor the pain, and never even mention it. I'm not perfect, and I'm sure that I have said or done things that hurtful to others too. To make a long story short, and skip beating around the bushes, I went through bankruptcy last year.  While going through this horrendous nightmare, I handled everything on my own.  Nobody heard a peep out of me, especially my family members.

By the time I had a court day to finalize my case, the appointment was at 8:00 o'clock in the morning, which was also the time that I had to take my son to school.  To make it on time to my appointment, I had to leave my house at around 7:00, and here was the dilemma: no one would be at the house with my son even if I took him off school.  He was only 10 years old, and there was no bus route for us either.

I thought about all the possibilities, but nothing worked out!  All my friends had jobs, and I could only trust a few of them.  A week before my court day, I still couldn't solve this dilemma.  I had called my lawyer to express this problem, he told me the court set the date, and it wouldn't be good for me to change it.

At a dinner gathering in my house one day, I finally told my sister that I've filed for bankruptcy, and then asked my niece if she could come, stay an hour with my son, and drop  him off at the school so I could go to court. I knew seven o'clock was early for her, but it would only happen once. I was desperate enough to ask, which I thought was a small favor, but it was somewhat Mount Everest to my sister.

She came out and bluntly told me: "It 's too early for her to drive all that way!" For your information, my niece lived about 15-20 minutes from me, and she had driven farther than this to spend time with her boyfriend.  I was stunt!  My inside was on fire, and I couldn't find words to say anything else after that.  Really, what do you say when you couldn't count on your own family members to lend a finger?

(Ghosh..It 've gotten too long, so 'til next time...)

Joining Alphabe-Thursday!

(Listed in Mish-Mash Series) Registered & Protected


  1. Mumsy, I know the feeling! No one thinks twice about asking us to sacrifice our time when it suits them, but ask something in return! I'm glad you got through it. I know it wasn't easy.

  2. Sadly, I understand. My family is much the same way.

  3. You have my deepest sympathy. I understand what you are saying. I have found my friends will help and standby me better than family. Sorry, you have had so many issues, but rely on your strength and you will survive all this. My question, did you every get to court?

  4. I am so fortunate that my family is so supportive. We've driven hours sometimes up to 18 hours to help each other out. I would still do it all over again in a heart beat. I hate that you had to go through that on your own. I can't begin to imagine.

  5. Sadly there are many peoples in your situation. Last week I had to go to hospital to get a wrist xray son was too busy so drove self came home in asplint with broken arm

  6. Sadly there are many peoples in your situation. Last week I had to go to hospital to get a wrist xray son was too busy so drove self came home in asplint with broken arm

  7. I'm sorry your family was not there for you in your time of need.

  8. I'm sorry that you're having such a difficult time. I hope you feel better about things soon.

  9. Well you know what they say, You can pick your friends but you're stuck with your family.

    I understand the difficult family sucks..

  10. It's hard enough to be told "no" when you really need the help, but to be denied by your family is even more hurtful.

    So sorry, Mumsy.


  11. I'm so sorry that your sister was not more supportive of you. I know that must hurt.

  12. Sometimes just because people are related to us doesn't mean they are connected to us. Sorry to hear about this hurtful situation!

  13. I am sorry that they didn't come through. They really should have.

  14. it really was a small favor but your family has been doing this to you for years. I am so sorry! You've made me pause and be thankful for the sisters I have and our relationship.

  15. So sad and frustrating. I am so sorry for you. :(

  16. You do what I did--you SCRAPE THEM OFF! I learned a long time ago that I could not depend on my family for ANYTHING. I am much happier since I made the break.

  17. Too early!! What time does the princess wake up usually?? Sorry to read your family was so unhelpful during the time when you needed them most.

  18. I am so fortunate to have a great family, They have been there for me and I will always be there for them.

  19. I might have most of your family members in my family as well.

    I have found, over time, that having no expectations is the only way to survive the chronic letdowns and hurt.

    And I have also found, that I am no longer silent about the injustices.

    Although I will not seek out confrontation, I do not allow anyone in my family to talk meanly to me.

    I'm sorry about the bankrupcy and sorrier still that your family let you down.

    There are good people in the world. Sadly, sometimes they aren't family members.

    Thank you for linking this week.

    I'm sending a hug your way along with your



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